Introspection

When I peep right into myself

I find an ocean of uncertainty

The deeper into myself I delve

Pride, courage & a bit of vanity

Complete my repertoire of vices

Armed with them various crises

Of life have I fought & overcome

But why do I talk of these alone

Nothing of life is carved in stone

Just as constant the inner turmoil

Boils and froths beneath the soil

Straining to find a fissure or fault

To release smoke and hot asphalt

Mighty volcano spouting forth fire

Have I faced the entire world’s ire

Would only some had understood

That what I did was all that I could

To make the best of the situation

To prevent damage & aggravation

And keep one away from scorching

Hate tumultuous that was torching

All that I held in esteem and grace

Washing dirty linen for my disgrace

In public not heeding the plaintiff cry

From one whose throat had run dry

Trying to protest her innocence for

I knew what lay festering at the core

Desires unfulfilled and hearts as hard

As stones so says the wandering bard

You reap what you sow so sow you must

Your seeds wisely because they may just

Be the cause of your downfall and bring

You misery that cannot will not spring

A groan a sigh or a tear from an eye

Or a benediction as your life comes nigh

God’s every creature was given a chance

To find love and peace & at every glance

Bestow tenderness amity & good cheer

Bliss for you was so far and yet so near

Had you but banished envy from your

Heart and soul and felt more secure

Had more faith in the bonds created

By your own efforts and procreated

Contentment ease and bounty of spirit

Supplemented each fault and demerit

Of  persons you chose to whip & lash

Mercilessly without rhyme nor reason

Hatred that seethed burnt in a flash

Every word was treated like treason

Huddled gossip and muck‘s galore

Women men wanted to settle score

For their own inadequacies and gloom

Wanted to send me and mine to doom

Ah what transpired is so sad to tell

But perhaps it may yet ring a bell

Battered shattered but very strong

Gentler and wiser for every wrong

That I had perforce borne so well

Emerged I from that burning hell

Like Phoenix rising from the ashes

Tears of blood damp on my lashes

I know surely I’ll live to see the day

Every penny that they’ll have to pay

For the wickedness they perpetrated

From all goodness and faith alienated

Miserably do they look to find release

Beckon in vain for flighty elusive peace

Cut throat villainy will soon no doubt

Catch up curses recriminations spout

All’s music when with gossip stained

Changed fast & the guns were trained

Upon each other and then the boot

Was awkwardly upon the other foot

My poor soul now no longer grieves

Coz there is no honour among thieves.